A Spiritual Moment, An Orange iPod, and Airborne Valium.

I can string this all together. Promise.

Let’s start with the spiritual moment. Before we get to it, I need to share something deeply personal and painful. I lost my beloved brother to cancer two years ago. He was 46, fit, and was in the prime of his life. He was extraordinary. He left behind a wife of 20+ years, two teenagers, an army of devastated friends and coworkers, and a shattered family. 

He was my older brother, and he was my hero. His death pains me in ways I cannot adequately express, and I’ll never get over it. But I will carry on, because that’s what he wanted. And that leads to the spiritual moment.

A few weeks ago I felt strong enough to go to yoga for the first time in a few years. Just being there was emotional for me, as it felt like progress and a new beginning. Somewhere in the middle of class when I was feeling particularly tuned in to my emotions, the most beautiful, heavenly, soothing music began to play. I was feeling the music deep in my soul, and and felt at once alive and vulnerable. I was thinking of myself and I was thinking of my brother.

After a few minutes of feeling this way I glanced toward the origin of the music and saw it was an orange iPod. This is significant because orange is the color we use to remember my brother. It’s ingrained in us now. Orange = Frankie, and he pops up in the most unexpected places. Like yoga class.

When I saw the iPod a voice inside me said “he’s here”. And I am telling you, I felt him. Deeply. I could feel him in the rhythm of the music. I could sense him flowing out of the iPod and running through my body. It was an indescribable moment of healing that penetrated my skin, my heart and my soul. In that moment he was alive with me. He was moving with me. I could almost touch him. Almost.

After class, I asked the instructor for information about the music. It turns out it’s a universal mantra for healing called RaMaDaSa by Snatam Kaur. You can listen to it here.

I have listened to this song over and over since that class, and it truly provides a healing vibration. I call it Airborne Valium because I cannot help but be comforted and soothed by it. If you are suffering in any way or are in need of comfort on any level, try this song.